What is the geekiest part of your music collection?
What does "geekiest" mean? You mean the trendiest? Most computer-oriented? Most contempt-drawing? I'll go with a mix: it's my set of hip-hop remixes of last ninja (C64) songs by putzi et al.

What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night?
Peanut butter balls. I made five hundred peanut butter balls with the intention of giving them to my friends as christmas presents. Now I have to make another batch to give as chinese new years presents because I ate 'em all. That's NINE MILLION calories, btw.

What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie?
Oh I see, this is the "how emo are you?" quiz. I don't have one, my cynical heart isn't moved by fakers like Kate Winslet and Geonardo DiMetrio.

Do you have a completely irrational fear?
That people think my voice is stupid sounding. It all started in elementary school when the kids made fun of me after reading for the class. Makes it hard to sing in my bands, lemme tell ya.

What is the little physical habit that gives away your insecure moment?
I dunno, but if I discover one I suppress the hell out of it.

Are you a pyromaniac?
My urge to start fires is entirely resistable. So no.

Do you have too many love interests?
What am I, a movie? I have exactly the right number of love interests.

Do you know anyone famous?
"Famous" Stephen Denyes is my cousin. Hmm. well I dunno how famous he is... uh.. I was in school band with and consistently had a crush on the christian pop star "Kumie" throughout our intermediate and high school years back when she didn't sing or go by her middle name.

Who should play you in a movie about your life?
Keanu Reeves, after he gets all fat and old and lets his hair go to hell. But only for the part of my life after the elementary school thing when I get my voice good and monotone.

Do you know how to play poker?
Yeah. It was an important part of some Apple ][ game we played at kdarr's house.

What do you carry with you at all times?
you mean when I'm walking around outside? The key to get back in my house, a small flashlight, 15 db earplugs, and enough money to buy a bullet.

What do you miss most about being little?
being all gullible and thinking there's magic and monsters and that the computer is both.

Are you happy with your given name?
Sure. Andrew. I just say it over and over and it makes me so goddamn HAPPY.

How much money would it take to get you to give up the internet for one year?
I'm not selling that.

What color is your bedroom?
White on the top. Grey on the bottom. Black in between.

What was the last song you were listening to?
Skinny Puppy - Optimissed

Have you ever been in a play?
Narrator.

Who is your best friend?
kdarr, because he has put up with my shit for like two whole decades and he's still funny.

Have you ever been in love?
Every time!

Do you talk a lot?
No.

Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?
Yeah, I just sit around all day thinking about myself.

Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?
OH Yeah, I spend a lot of time just considering and considering, over how fucking NICE I am.

Do you spend more time with your boy/girlfriend or your friends?
The secret "do you have a boy/girlfriend" question.

What's one thing you wish you could do but can't?
Laser spaceship pilot.

Favorite fabric?
AERMET100

Something you love and hate?
well duh the whole life thing

Do you tell your friends about your sex life?
Not really. GUYS, I FUCKED! Yeah, sounds fascinating.

What's the one language you want to learn?
Gerrrman

How do you eat an apple?
I gently feed it to an adorable horse, then eat the horse.

What do you order at a bar?
cape cod. it's red!

Have you ever pierced your body parts?
My first piercing was when I was 5 and I discovered that my mom's sewing machine was plugged in. Drove that big needle all the way through my index finger, from the center of the fingernail. Don't see many people with pierced fingertips, do you?

Do you have tattoos?
No. I just draw on myself when I want cartoons or splotches on my body.

What's one of the "funniest" things you've ever done?
Dis one time, I wen do dis ting; Ho! so funny!

Do you drive stick?
Yeah, but it's not graceful.

What kind of watch(es) do you wear?
I don't wear one. But if I did, it'd be the steel and green one philippe starck designed for fossil.

Most frivolous purchase?
I bought a broken $6000 Cygnus CD-Replicator robot from Matt Ghali. It is still sitting in my storage space. It takes a CD, memorizes it, then you feed it a stack of CDRs and go away. When you come back, it has the stack of CDRs in the output hopper with the first CD copied onto them. Great for self-published musicians and pirates (cd pirates, not yo ho ho pirates) It's huge, heavy, and doesn't work, but it boots up and I think the problem is just the hard drive is bad. Oh, and I bought it for $50.

Do you consider yourself materialistic?
A little. I can't help it. I am an American. That's how we gauge success these days.

What do you cook the best?
Fried chicken. Bam.

Favorite writing instrument?
Pentel Hybrid Gel "grip"

Do you prefer to stand out or blend in?
if I had to choose, stand out. Is this a cheap venue to declare ones halfassed individuality? Who consciously decides to be samey?

Do you have anything monogrammed?
sure, I write my initials (FOR WHICH I MADE A SPECIAL LOGO THAT IS THE SAME FLIPPED UPSIDE DOWN) on everything I own that doesn't bite.

Would you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex?
It probably wouldn't just OCCUR to me, no. But if you look at my highschool yearbook, half the pictures in it are of boys dressed as really sloppy girls. So you never know.

What's one car you will never buy?
Realistically, mostly all of them. But since this is an opportunity to ridicule one car in particular, I'd have to single out the Pontiac Aztek. Bad name, bad hannibal lecter front end, bad squarebutt... does pontiac have a special BAD IDEA team? Apologies if you are in the bad idea team. I'm sure you were trying.

What kind of books do you like to read?
I LIKE TO READ ANY KIND OF BOOK.... THE KIND THAT MAKE ME CRY HAHAHA.

If you won the lottery, what would you do?
Fix the little dent in my goddamn car fender. That's how much money I'd have to have before that would come to the top of the money priority list.

Burial or cremation?
Which do I want? Doesn't matter what you do with my body, but make a HUGE GRAVESTONE out of something indestructible. Then shoot it at fucking Mars! Arrr!

How many online journals do you read regularly?
5 or less, unless you count my friends list as being separate journals, in which case 94.

What's one thing you're a sore loser at?
Star Control. But that's ok, cause I never lose.

If you don't like a person, how do you show it?
I totally defriend them to the max

Do you cry in front of friends?
Only if they just died

What kind of first impression do you think you give to people?
They think I'm so cool and cute and I ride a motorcycle.

What's one thing you like to do alone?
Eat hot wings. It's so undignified.

Are you a giver or a taker?
Well, uh, seems like it must be both.

What have you stolen before?
Software. But not the online pussy way; I walk out of the store with a "legit" copy. (law: I don't do this anymore)

When's the last time you cried?
Not too long ago I started really thinking about what it means for our Dads and friends to be dead, and it kind of got to me, and though I had never cried about it before, I suddenly realized the loss and I just did. And I was pretty shaky for the next few days, too.

Favorite communication method?
Storytelling.

How many drinks before you're tipsy?
I'm not sure which one is tipsy. A few? 3?

Favorite kind of porn?
Furniture porn. I do feel really bad about how it objectifies chairs, and home furnishings in general, though.

How often do you have sex?
Aha, the secret prurient interest question that this whole stupid quiz is here to justify.

Have you ever done any illegal drugs?
Just YOUR MOM. Snap! Burn! Snurp!

Do you think you're cute?
Oh yeah, I just spend hours at home thinking about how stupendously CUTE I am.

Do you have problems changing clothes in front of friends?
"Problems"? Like, I suddenly can't put on my pants? No. Am I embarassed by being naked? Yeah. In front of my friends? Let me ask.
->"GUYS I AM ABOUT TO BE NAKED IN FRONT OF YOU ALL, IS THERE A PROBLEM?"
<-"BOO TO THAT"

In summary, this quiz was engineered by online pedophiles to gather information relating to a given person's sexual boundaries (or lack of) and how willing they are to get naked in front of their new "friends".